Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
