Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize