You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
