last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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