time to smoke my breakfast
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
