my sisters under your porch take her home
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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