Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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