I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
