New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
