I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
