that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
