just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
