At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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