If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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