I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
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I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
