Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
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