no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
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right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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