Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize