She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize