ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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