glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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