The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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