tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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