You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
