Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Randomize
