I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
