His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
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I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
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and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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