Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
