who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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