Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Randomize
