State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
