I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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