D3 body, D1 cock
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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