So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
