All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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