if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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