We're like a lot better than the average bears
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
