So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
