i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
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