Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
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