New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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