so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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