How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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