guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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