Nicole vs. Life
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
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