I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Alive.
So much puke
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Randomize
