Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Randomize
