I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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