he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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