So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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